Thursday, April 30, 2009

Just say no = total bitch

I finally put my foot down and now I feel like a super bitch. About 6 months ago, a new co-worker started organizing parties for every body's birthdays at work as well as an extravagant secret Santa at Christmas. In the past we had always just brought in food and a card and had a little party to celebrate. Now, every time I turn around we are expected to chip in $20-$25 for a gift AND bring food. WTF!!!!!!!??????? I hate to be a Grinch but enough is enough!!!!!!!! I barely know these people!!! I can hardly keep up with all the gifts and wedding presents for friends and family. Anyway, after being asked to chip in $20 for an umbrella (who came up with the idea of buying this woman an umbrella and why does she need such an expensive one anyway??), I went postal and said that enough is enough... if someone wants to buy a gift on their own...fine.... but no more group presents!!!! Now everyone thinks I am a total party pooper and apparently I am but somebody had to take a stand.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Sometimes you can't win....

I have the ability to attract weirdos. I can be in a room full of a hundred people and the weirdest guy in he room is going to come up to me and introduce himself. My sister has the same affliction... so does my friend Roxanne. We are all normal, attractive, well groomed, fashionable women so what is the reason for this invisible freak attractor??? The quandary is how to react to them. I am frequently guilty of being too nice to people which is exactly the wrong thing to be when these types of men are coming on to you. Being nice makes them think that you want to be their friend. On the other end of the spectrum is just flat out being a bitch and telling them to relocate and get lost. This can backfire too because if they really have a screw loose, they can suddenly have a vendetta against you for being so mean. Like I said..... sometimes you can't win.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Miss Independent

Time to start buying some land. It looks like we might have a full house. People are already moving here by the boatload. The increase in out of state plates on the the roads here is not going unnoticed. It is kind of like in the 70's when all the people from up north were moving here. I can't tell you how many new students we have had transferring here that are from Michigan, Ohio, and California (the increase in our overall enrollment numbers is something like 45%!!!!) I actually like Rick Perry aka "Governor Zoolander" (except for his crazy road idea which is hopefully DOA.... you don't mess with Texan's property, his mandatory vaccine idea (dumb ass!), and a few of his other views which I won't get into here.) For those of you who think he is not doing a good job though, .....leave....... the grass is definitely not greener on the other side. Adios mofo!!!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Happy Easter!!!!!

Happy Easter Y'all!!!!

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Attention book nerds

As usual, I am late for the party. I just discovered weRead. A super fantastic place to store the titles of the books you have read. You can also find new titles/authors, write reviews and rate books, and discuss books you have read with others. I love this site!!!!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Just like Black Friday

I have never been to the first day of a Tuesday Morning sale until yesterday. Crazy!! I am definitely not the type of person to wake up early to camp out overnight somewhere in the freezing cold to stand in line to buy something. I think I have only done that once in my life and it was during a poor lapse in judgement some time during the 90's when I got up at 4am to stand in line to try and get a Furby. So why did I find myself in a line of about 50 crazy shoppers on Tuesday morning at 7:30 waiting to get into the store? An umbrella. Yep, that's right.... a stupid patio umbrella.

I have been wanting one of those jumbo patio umbrellas (the good kind) to put by the pool for a couple of years now, but I just could not part with the $130 bucks that they all seem to be selling for. A couple of days ago I was looking through the Tuesday Morning flyer when there on the front page was the exact umbrella I had been looking for. The amazing part was that it was only $39 (regular price $134)!!!!! On Monday, I stopped by the store and scoped out the situation to make sure they actually had more than 2 of the umbrellas for sale. You know how that goes. Most of these places only get one of the sale items in just to get you in the store. If you are not familiar with how Tuesday Morning works, they put out their sale items a couple of days before the sale and attach big signs to them saying that if you want to buy that particular item, you will have to come back on Tuesday morning. Surprisingly, they had about 15 of them in stock so I felt pretty sure that I would have a chance at getting my hands on one. I mean, really, how many people would get up early on a Tuesday morning to buy an umbrella.

Apparently a lot of people wanted the damn umbrellas. I got there about 7:30 and the line went around the corner. I had planned on being there around 7am but of course I had to get behind lots of people who obviously had nowhere else to be on a Tuesday morning except driving 20 miles below the speed limit in front of me on a two lane road with no possible way to pass them. Arghhhh! Finally, after getting around the slow driving morons and hitting every possible red light in the universe, I pulled into the packed parking lot and my jaw dropped. Tons of people and a huge line. They finally opened the door and since I knew where the umbrellas were, I had an advantage over the lost and confused people which allowed me to make it to the umbrella table just in time to grab one. We will not discuss the fact that I may or may not have pulled it out of a little girl's hands who was also reaching for it. Her family already had three of them in their basket. Tough luck kid! Yea!!! I have my umbrella! It makes up for standing in line for the damn Furby that I never got.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Random weirdness

So, to all the manly men out there that like to work outside in their gardens...... apparently a new medical study of 700 men showed that working in the garden 30 minutes a day, 5 days a week can reduce the risk of impotence by almost 40 %. Umm... yeah...... How do they come up with this stuff and more importantly... what man out there is going to listen to this advice?